Families and arthritis.

Special relationships

If a spouse has arthritis

Arthritis intrudes into people's personal lives. This can be felt dramatically in the marital relationship. However, keep in mind that your spouse is the same person he or she was before the impact of arthritis.

Although lovemaking may need to be adapted somewhat because of pain or limited mobility you can still have intimacy. A little planning helps. For instance, taking pain medication and a warm bath ahead of time may make for a painless experience and a more relaxing one. Also, keep in mind that gentle touching is an important part of intimacy that isn't affected by arthritis. Letting each other's needs be known is the key. Being honest with each other can help a couple through the toughest times.

If a parent has arthritis

If you're a teenager, you're going through physical and emotional changes that may present challenges from time to time. Having a parent sick with arthritis while you are going through your teen years may be extra hard on you. Make sure you find a positive way to express your anger, fear, frustration, and sadness about your parent's arthritis. Discuss these feelings with your parent or parents, friend, teacher, or school counselor. When you feel your emotions are bottled up inside, do something such as jump on a trampoline, ride your bike, have a good cry, pound pillows, swim, dance, or work out.

Keep in mind that it isn't anyone's fault that your parent has arthritis. The disease isn't contagious, like the flu. Your children won't necessarily get it. You will need to be patient with your parent. Remember it works both ways--your patience with your parent enables him or her to be patient with you.

If an elderly parent has arthritis

If your elderly parent is disabled, you may need to make arrangements within the family to provide help with daily activities. This kind of help is called custodial care. Few insurance plans today pay for this kind of care in a nursing home. Contact family service agencies in your community that offer home health aids or services. Many of these agencies adjust their fees to meet all income levels.

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